Lolita anyone (Part 2)- The Malaysian Insider
JUNE 6, 2013 — “There are many cases of men marrying underage girls. I do not see why my case should be any different”. This a quote from Riduan Masmud, who is alleged to have raped and then married a 13-year-old, in The Star recently.
A couple of years ago I had written an article discussing underage marriages in Malaysia suggesting that left unchecked, loopholes in the law could make the country a haven for legalised paedophilia. If he is right, then this is coming to pass. But this recent case has taken the problem a step further, with the ability to rape children and still walk away scot-free by simply marrying the child becoming a real possibility.
A lot has been written about the consequences of the early sexualisation of children, forced or otherwise, and the effects of underage marriages to belabour the point except to say that there are sound reasons to abhor the practice. What is of deeper interest are the social circumstances that make such practices acceptable. What allows society to believe that marriage is the right answer for their young children when they have been forcefully sexualised? For that matter why are so many girls even in a position to be taken advantage of by much older men, where the perpetrator can claim consent?
It is instructive to note that in a number of cases, including the latest one, the existent wife is amenable to the idea of her middle-aged husband bringing a 13-year-old as his new bride, younger than even possibly their children.
Traditional stereotyping of women and their amplification in media may have something to do with this. London Weight Management in a recent ad takes up a case of a woman whose deepest problem seems to be that her husband will not hold her hand in public because she weighs 65kg. Of course once she loses a few of those pesky kilogrammes, he is delighted to hold her hand again. The implicit presumption being the primary source of identity for women is the nature of the male gaze.
Following on uninvited are notions of male supremacy, the desirability of marriage as a superior primary activity over a career, the alleged importance of sex to land a husband and being a third wife being somehow still preferable to being single or divorced. While it is true that social change is generally slow, it is the role of lawmakers, the judiciary, the education system and the media to promote social behaviour that safeguards the rights of women and promotes gender equality to the point that society itself recognises these attitudes as universally desirable.
Marrying the victim only adds lifelong insult to the injury. Holding hands should be a sign of love between two people, not a sexual trophy for the man. When there is an opportunity provided by weak family values, legal loopholes and a reluctance by the powers that be to take on the problem head on, there will always be men using and abusing our daughters and getting away with it.
If the true measure of the development of a society is the treatment handed out to its children, allowing this state of affairs to continue without protest does not augur well for Malaysia.
A couple of years ago I had written an article discussing underage marriages in Malaysia suggesting that left unchecked, loopholes in the law could make the country a haven for legalised paedophilia. If he is right, then this is coming to pass. But this recent case has taken the problem a step further, with the ability to rape children and still walk away scot-free by simply marrying the child becoming a real possibility.
A lot has been written about the consequences of the early sexualisation of children, forced or otherwise, and the effects of underage marriages to belabour the point except to say that there are sound reasons to abhor the practice. What is of deeper interest are the social circumstances that make such practices acceptable. What allows society to believe that marriage is the right answer for their young children when they have been forcefully sexualised? For that matter why are so many girls even in a position to be taken advantage of by much older men, where the perpetrator can claim consent?
It is instructive to note that in a number of cases, including the latest one, the existent wife is amenable to the idea of her middle-aged husband bringing a 13-year-old as his new bride, younger than even possibly their children.
Traditional stereotyping of women and their amplification in media may have something to do with this. London Weight Management in a recent ad takes up a case of a woman whose deepest problem seems to be that her husband will not hold her hand in public because she weighs 65kg. Of course once she loses a few of those pesky kilogrammes, he is delighted to hold her hand again. The implicit presumption being the primary source of identity for women is the nature of the male gaze.
Following on uninvited are notions of male supremacy, the desirability of marriage as a superior primary activity over a career, the alleged importance of sex to land a husband and being a third wife being somehow still preferable to being single or divorced. While it is true that social change is generally slow, it is the role of lawmakers, the judiciary, the education system and the media to promote social behaviour that safeguards the rights of women and promotes gender equality to the point that society itself recognises these attitudes as universally desirable.
Marrying the victim only adds lifelong insult to the injury. Holding hands should be a sign of love between two people, not a sexual trophy for the man. When there is an opportunity provided by weak family values, legal loopholes and a reluctance by the powers that be to take on the problem head on, there will always be men using and abusing our daughters and getting away with it.
If the true measure of the development of a society is the treatment handed out to its children, allowing this state of affairs to continue without protest does not augur well for Malaysia.
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